The female-only Special Operations Forces created
by the Thai Secret Service, employed in unconventional
warfare, foreign internal
defense, direct action, Counter-Terrorism, and special reconnaissance
anti-Thai terrorist communications are transferred via helium-filled balloon, a special method of intercepting
such messages has been devised and is the specific expertise
of the PBA. All agents have been trained for years in the ingenious art of striking down these air-born missives with Manually
Rockets (DARTS, Thai acronym) which they dispatch from their Internal
Propulsion Muscular Launch Pads (VAGINA, Thai acronym).
Though no footage exists of the PBA in action, training exercises
can be viewed at a number of facilities
on the 2nd Floor at Patpong 1 in Krung Thep (Bangkok), Thailand, usually after 17.00 hours with a two drink minimum.
"Some guy grabbed my arm as I was street shopping in the Patpong district last night, insisting that
I should view a special Patpong Balloon Assassins training
exercise. Then he pushed me up a flight of stairs."